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« WHAT IS LOVE? | Main | Is Dating The New Commitment »

Let Go Of That Old Broken Relationship (make room for the new)

         Many people want to find love, feel love, and be in love. But before you can have a healthy, successful relationship, you have got to let go of your past. Let go of your past hurt. Let go of that weight that is holding you down from being happy. It is no longer necessary to have grief or sadness from a relationship you are no longer in. You two are not together for one reason or another, so why in the hell would you want to carry the pain that relationship brought unto you. And stop thinking of all the good things, the good times. They too are in the past, let it go! For goodness sakes, just stop! By doing so it will allow you to move forward and find someone who will love you, want you, cherish you as you do them.

      But before we go forward, there is one more thing that has to change. What is it? Well, you find this new person that you are really digging, you really like them, and you might even be falling in love. In fact all is going well…but BAM, you sabotage your own new relationship. How? Here comes the past creeping in your head again, and what’s worse is you are allowing it. In doing so you get confused and now you are jeopardizing you new relationship that was going so beautifully.

      You know it is so hard to find someone that is genuinely a good person.  A person who is ready for love that wants to love and be loved. Not only are they ready, but you hit gold if you find a person who is caring, loving, and not selfish. So if you are feeling so glorious about this new relationship, why would you f**k it up by letting the past take space in your head and heart.  Something productive will ok, something that was ciaos, why?

      So how can you stop this behavior? There are two ways. One is when you think of the past relationships, change your train of thinking immediately, within 28 days you should change your thought process naturally. The second one is writing down all the things that hurt you in the past relationship (or relationships). Carry this paper around and when you think of going back to the past, pull that paper out and read the crap you went through. In time (about 28 days) you will have trained your brain to see how unhappy the situation was.

      Also you can write down all the awesome things that this new relationship brings to you. Leave it someplace handy, like in your pocket, car or refrigerator and read it. You can add to the paper as your new relationship grows, continue to write down your feelings, or events. You will eventually see what the new relationship is giving, growing and the love you are receiving and hopefully you are returning as well.

      It’s so hard to find a person you really have fun with, have great chemistry and you can truly be yourself. So if and when you do I want you to be ready. You don’t want to lose a good thing because of your past. Remember in life we all walk forward, not backwards. Why? Because we are not going in that direction, that is just common sense, right???  

                                                     Love, Barbara Jeanne

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