Is Dating The New Commitment?

Today's rules of marriage or a life time partner seems to have changed, or be a thing of the past. There is no longer life time romance or I can't live without you, for always and forever love. Actually that seems to end six months into the relationship if it is even to last that long. And if it does pass that lust and grow into love, why are couples so easy to throw in the towel? Being married doesn't seem to matter, till death do we part really means until we give up and stop trying. Could it be that old saying the grass is greener on the other side, but is it? Or are we so easy to disregard a relationship as easy as it is to stop working out or give up on that diet that we can't do. People always say it's hard to find a good woman or man, but when we do find them we seem not to want them. Are we programmed in relationships as we are as children to get bored with a toy and toss it aside for the new one? Is it men that have changed or is it women that are willing to accept less? Are men simply satisfied going to work, do their weekly agenda and seeing their love interest when they feel the need for affection, intimacy, or maybe just sex. Is dating the new commitment? Is romance dead; is it too late to bring it back? Women watch romantic movies wishing it was them, men call these movies chick flicks. So how can we get back on the same page? It might be too much to ask a man to come to our rescue as a knight and shining armor. But maybe if we women as a whole wouldn't accept anything but more, we just might get romance back in our men. I can't speak for all women just hopeless romantics like me. Barbara Jeanne xo

RELATIONSHIPS SO EASY TO START SO HARD TO KEEP

I am so surprised how relationships have changed. I know people want them, I hear this just about every day. But as fast as the relationship may start, it's about as fast as they seem to end. They are almost becoming existent. There are so many dating sites but I think people are getting a dating site confused with a relationship site. Yes you have to date to move forward to a long term relationship but somehow it doesn't seem to get that far too often. Although it may say check the long term box on the questionnaire, but for most part I think it becomes exactly what it says, dating. Then we have women and men saying they met the nicest guy or woman but I only see or hear from them once a week. A call here and there and a couple texts, to say hey, what's up? Just enough to keep you hanging on, while they are checking out the many others they see on how ever many site they might be on. At some point I talk with people that I think they are more interested in the high of talking to the person on line, then actually meeting the person. It's almost you can predict the persons evening. To come home, get a bite to eat and jump on line and off they are for a night of relationship with the person they choose to talk to that night. It might be a repeater from the evening before or someone new. Either way dating sites are turning to a night with a lap top and a stranger. People seem to be able to stay content with this more and more and it’s ashamed. If you do meet the person from a site, local bar, or where ever it might be and hit it off, what may be the problem that it doesn't go far? What I am finding from people I have counseled, is selfishness. People seem to be so self-absorbed that they don't want to give. They sure are good at taking but they are not so good for doing for another. Hardly with family and friends have we known all our lives, let alone a partner? Why, life seems okay, smooth, no waves, but one day you will realize you're alone. It may be when you are down on your luck and wish you had someone. It may come when you're older and not so good for the pickings. A man I once counseled said to me, when I was younger I didn't want to be in a relationship. He thought he was the **** and wanted to run and play, although already married. He then said, but now that I'm older and really want to find a nice lady, nobody wants him. He was 52, he passed at 58 alone. So are we able to get back love, romance, that old fashions love you always and forever? Absolutely! How? Love like there's no tomorrow, love like you love yourself. And love because being loved back feels absolutely wonderful! xo Barbara Jeanne