WHAT'S GOING ON?

I hear so many women that are having man trouble. How they are confused, they just don't know how to get their man to commit. Working in a gym for many years, training both men and women. I have had the opportunity to hear both sides. Here is what I have learned and frankly, why just maybe men won't commit. First off, yes men do have the tendency to become lazy in a relationship. Maybe even a total turn around from when you two first met when he was trying to get you into bed, and maybe even win your heart. Men truly don't intentionally mean to get bored with you and ignore you, but honestly women don't help the situation at all. Women have all these expectations of what they want from their men. They want to be wined and dined and by the end of the month, that leaves guys putting out enough money for a car payment. Women ...men ask please stop nagging and stop trying to control, you are taking the fun out of the relationship. Men work all week, well most of them, what they want, to relax, so let them. Give them their own time. Women and men are not communicating, or someone isn't listening, because it's leaving us with the question, what's going on? Women are wondering,why men won't commit, and men are wondering why they get dumped in the first place. When a women falls in love she falls hard, she gives herself and heart completely. At this point it only makes the man loose interest, they like the competition, to conquer, then when when successful, they get a bit bored. They may work too hard, play too much, giving little time to us women, leaving women to feel devastated and unloved. So how do women react? Bitter, mean and if you are married, watch out...you men are in for a big burn. So, that leaves us with a lot of jaded men that can't seem to pull out of the hurt that they endured, even though a man might not admit it, and usually doesn't. Men find it easier to go on with their lives keeping it simple. That also means it's hard for them to give their heart and to commit to us women. I too have been divorced, when I left I figured there has been enough pain, and asked for nothing, but what did come from the relationship was my beautiful daughter, I do not call it a failed relationship. it is two people with different directions. So for all those holding on to the past, the pain, it's time to...Let It Go...That may be one of my favorite sayings. So, trying to stay neutral, here is some advice. I think women need to ease up and not control men, and I'm not speaking for all women. I think men need to judge each woman independently, There are some really good women and men out there, if you open your mind and your heart, you might find a friend and even someone to love. And that a really good feeling! XO BARBARA JEANNE

Comments

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Don't demand those cliché phrases: well, forcing your guy to chant ‘I love you”, “I miss you” might suffice your hunger to hear those love soaked words, but you don't know it might be downright irritating for your guy. On the first point he might feel that why do you want to hear the same words again and again? For those who are sincere towards you would feel a bit uneasy with these regular demanded disclosures, while those who are just flirting away might feel it nothing more than a clutching nab

Flabbergast, shock and surprise: Well, now the ball is in your court. Get a man to commit by pleasantly revealing the different shades of your personality. Make him feel it deep down inside that he might not only lose a girlfriend if he loses you, but also a rare amalgamation of a mentor, friend and guide. Most of the guys, no matter, how young or old they are, they go for those tender souls who can understand them, give them solace and space.

Don't rush: Most of the times, women get into the desperate state of demanding commitment, as they have already given into physical temptations. It becomes a bit difficult to get along without him anymore, after sharing those intimate moments, which keep flooding your memory on and on. Thus, be patient, check whether he is serious or is he just treating it like just another one night stand.

Don't hold grudges: At times, some women face the kind of difficulty in disclosing how committed they are, when they are not receiving the normal response from their man. Well, in this case, this kind of attitude will only add to the brewing distance between you two. Make sure that you at least, keep on indirectly revealing your guy how committed you are. At least, he won’t grow sour and evidently, one day will definitely come when he realizes your value. Don't change your love for him. After all, by the end of the day he craves to hear your voice and rest in your solace.

Marriage commitment: Get a man to commit might get tedious when commitment means marriage in your dictionary. Well, it’s not your fault, if it does. After all, men are from mars and women are from Venus. You need to be very straight, right from the very beginning of the relation that you are expecting a lot higher than just a mere pass time. Marriage should be like an inevitable transition of your love rather than a shocking demand

Just like you, even your man contemplated a lot regarding the prominent turn his life might take with marriage in the cards. Give him time, space and above all, your trust. It will take time, for sure but you should have the patience to wait for him, bending down on his knees, with rose in his hands, lost in the process of proposing you.