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Keeping the Want in Your Relationship; Having your Man or Women Have the Want to Want You & How!

                         I am so determined to teach people how to love enough to have a lasting relationship. I want to teach people how to keep the want to be with your partner. This is so important more than you may think. Your partner has to have the want to see you, hold you, touch you, and spend time with you. How do you achieve this? That would be to bring joy and laughter with you and your partner in your relationship. So how does this go, well do you remember when you were young and simpler things made you happy? You would be happy to go a bit wild, go outside the box all those things that made us giggle or giddy in love. We lose this as we grow older. Yet the inner child in us wants to come out. Somehow we feel as if we have lost a part of us that made our lives and ourselves happy. We talk to our friends about how our partners have become boring, not paying attention to us. We strive to find it in our own relationship failing to do so, at times we may go searching for it in another person. Here is where it goes wrong. If you can keep the playfulness the love and passion in your relationship this will make the want. The want to come home to you, to see you, be with you and to love you. In doing this your partner will be more willing to keep you happy. We spend so much time thinking negative that we become bitter with everything that is wrong with the relationship. In magazines that we read, even those that I have written in it tells us women to throw on some lipstick and buy some lingerie and have a sexy night. But if your man is not feeling the want this situation can go terribly wrong. If you lose the connection in the heart and soul for the person you lose the person. Just as if a man is not doing his duty as a man when his woman feel he is not taking care of her. Not necessarily in the old fashion sense of the way but for example foreplay. For a man we think it begins at the beginning of sex which is completely wrong. Foreplay is a hug to your lady when you walk in. Gentle kisses on her neck as you’re passing by. And asking how her day was and to actually listen to her. Men on the other hand like to be encouraged, to make them feel like they can when they are in doubt. These are some of the ways to keep the want alive. One of the biggest blows to a healthy sex life is to say no…no…no…when the other is asking to be intimate. If you are not feeling it, do some soul searching and communicate why you might not be feeling the urge. Ask yourself would you want to come home to you? Are you fun or are you cranky more often than not. When two people meet it is the fun that you two have that draws you closer. You start off with good chemistry, good conversation and when you get there the sex was probably pretty awesome but what do all these have in common? You had fun doing each and every one of these together. Basically whatever you did together you had fun and this brought you two to reach the point of beginning a relationship. It may go so far to make it to the “I do”.  If this is the case you have to say you loved each other enough to bring it to this level. So what happens when you lose the want? You fall out of love with your partner eventually. You might love them but you are no longer in love. To some you may feel like it’s too late but to those that are still in love or are trying to get the person they are crushing on to want them this may be of some importance. To create the want you need to be consistent on how you act from when you meet and each day after that. No one can be in the same mood everyday but you can’t go from night to day it’s a turn off. How you treat your partner is important and should be with kindness, compassion, consideration, encouragement, love and care. The list can go on and on but you get the idea. If you lift your partner they should lift you right back. If you show them an overabundance of love this is what you should be getting back in return. This one is very important…be fun…be fun…be fun. We are not all clowns or have it in us to be goofy, silly or a bundle of joy but it’s important that you keep some excitement in your relationship from day one and this doesn’t stop as well. You can’t have a perfect relationship or have the perfect day everyday but you do need to keep the rhythm going. When you are couple you cannot always stay in sync. One of you may feel a bit more lovey dovey one week, than the following week it may be the opposite way around and this can become frustrating. But this is totally normal so relax because you will have those times that you are completely in sync. So before we get to off the subject let’s get back to finish the want. To want something is to desire greatly, to crave but most important to need. When you need someone because they complete you, make you a happier person, a better person this is real. Creating it to be isn’t as hard as you would think. To create the want you simply have to love unconditionally as you did when you two first met when you didn’t see all your lovers’ flaws. And yes they have flaws we all do, we just have to simply choose to see the beauty and love in your sweetheart and when you do this they should return the love back. To recap, when you love with a sweet tenderness ladies men really respect it as an asset not a weakness. As for men… women love a man that they know can take care of them but love when they can show their lady a tender softness. Last but not least, romance should never leave your relationship and if you treat you partner as written in this article with love you will have romance. Men pick or bring some flowers for your lady, get her favorite candy, or call just to say "I love you". Ladies make your mans favorite meal, put a sweet note in their lunch or suit pocket. Send a sexy pic to keep them wanting to run home. The easiest ways to try to understand the want is to look at yourself in the mirror and ask if you are truly a loving person to your partner. After you have your answer it’s all up to you. Barbara Jeanne xo

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