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« Why Love, Why Be N a Relationship? | Main | New Year, Healthier Relationships..Here's How & So Easy! »



            Love is such a beautiful gift. To love and to be loved feels absolutely awesome. Yet so many people are having such a hard time connecting.  There are several reasons why, one being that people seems to be okay doing their own daily routines.  And they seek for intimacy only when the feel it’s necessary.  Guys have now learned to cook, clean and wash their own clothes. Many single girls don’t want to cook, clean, or wash clothes. Girls do these chores only when they have to. 

            These days computers allow us to have online relationships. And for some that is enough. And this goes for both guys and the girls. So it plays out something like this. After they finished up their daily necessities, they hop online. There are many people that a satisfied to have a night of great conversation with that one special person they are having this online relationship with.  Maybe they just want to mingle with several, of course until its bedtime when it’s now time get off. These people feel content enough that they had a night of good conversation. Next they do what they have to do and call it a night.

             The reality of actually of real life meetings, they may like you but they may find a liking for a few different people as well. What happens if they meet someone at the store, local bar, wherever and want to bring them home for a quick romp in the bed? They want that option. So that brings me to think, are we going back in time, were casual sex was a common thing? And keep love out of the equation? That is a sad thought to think.

                Because love actually makes you prosper. It puts a bounce in your step. Makes you want to do better, because you are happy.  Even though this can be a blessing, many people don’t see it that way. People are sent into your life for a purpose, yet many times it goes unnoticed.  Sometime we are meant to help another, other times people are here to help you. But mostly, we have two types of people. The caretakers, these are people that are put here to help you get through tough times, or whatever might be the purpose. Others are the takers, many stand alone. They take love but the love they get, they don’t give that love back in return. Leaving the person they are with feeling a lack of being loved.

                 So we need to balance out things a bit. Try to fix this mess that we have created and doing this hopefully the people searching for love might actually find it. We need to see the benefits of love and for those that want love, see if you are giving what is necessary. Love is not the drama that we make it to be.  We see and feel the signs of not being loved, and it is a shitty feeling. So when those signs are coming to you loud and clear, it pretty much means at this point it’s time to let it go.

               Instead of trying to make someone that doesn’t have it in them to love as you should be loved, you need to have the strength to walk away and let it go. Yes it will hurt, but in the long run you will have passed on probably a long period that you would have been heartbroken.  So in the long run, a relationship like this will only bring you heartache. And you deserve love not hurt or pain.

                 Love is such an amazing feeling. If you open your heart and let someone in you will see how a healthy relationship builds you up. Make you become the best you can be. They are more than just being someone you can hang out with. They are your partner, your lover, your best friend, the one that boost you to do even better than you are. And if you think you are fine on your own, you could be. But having a partner will bring you to an even higher level. With the right person, this is a fact.  

               I knew a wonderful guy and I was friends with his sons. He asked me out, and said he’d treat me better than who I was with. I told him I had to decline. He then said to me “when I was younger I didn’t care about being in a relationship, or being married. (Which he was married at one point and had 4 children). I liked doing my own thing; being alone, hanging with friends. I didn’t think I needed anyone. I thought I was the shit, running the streets, hanging with different women and having a good time”. He went on to say “now that I am older and want a relationship and to be loved, no one wants me.” He went through cancer and being sick basically alone. He died at the age of 62.

              I believe people want to be loved, but we have become too selfish, too reckless with peoples heart, and are comfortable running solo. But being love while it last feels absolutely f**king amazing. Better than any feeling. Instead of thinking negative, let’s try to think positive about why being in a healthy relationship would be awesome. Two heads are better than one. Oh, behind every good man is a great woman. And the connection and intimacy between two people is nurturing to your life. The one thing we now have to learn is how to behave while we are in a relationship. Some people do know. Others need a little help. But that will be my next article. Love, Barbara Jeanne

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