New Year Resolution

A new year is upon us. Did you make your New Year Resolyion as we all do every year. Let us be honest, we usually fail, when it comes to keeping this There are a few out there that are able to do it. I am happy to say I kept mine of last year and stoped smoking. So once again it is time to make a new one and I would love to help those who are looking to better their relationship in the New Year or better themselves. I talk so much about relationships, let us step back and see the step to making you as a person get there. They say that if you feel good about yourself, you are happier in general. So here we go let start. The most important person YOURSELF! When you are happy, you make other people happy. The first step is building back up your relationship, step by step. Another one is you feeling better by working out. I am also a fitness director, instructor. I am certified in nutrition. I am certified in, zumba, step, aerobics, kick boxing, pilates, yoga, and i am a certified dance teacher. So starting today I will be posting up suggestions, how to work out different parts of your body. I have beenin this field, well let us just say for a very long time. I have managed gyms, owned an aerobic and dance studio and worked for an orthopedic doctor and therapist. I went back to college, to further my knowledge. So the point is, i know that everyone says they can do it but I am asking you to give me a chance to get you fit. I am making a page fitness with videos. With 10  minutes a day, you will see a difference in three weeks, 100% positive. If you follow. So why don't you make this one of your new years resolutions and let us get started! XO BARBARA JEANNE

Different Positions...Different Places

 Making love is such an important part of a relationship. Many people seem to forget this. When two people first meet, it is all hot and heavy but as time goes by it seems to get old. Infarct out comes the old pajamas. Here comes the excuse, why it is not a good time to have sex. Too tired, too busy and sometimes us woman, you know the one, we didn't shave. Or heck, maybe we do have sex and do it all hairy. Anyway, it shouldn't be like that. Sex or love making should be fun. No matter what, this is one thing I have always tried to keep intact. There are my days that I definitely am a pajama mama, especially in the winter time. It is not something that should be an everyday practice, especially in the warm weather. That is the time you can dare to go bare. That is one thing all designers, from Wal-Mart to Macys are making cute clothes in every size. Fun outfits for in and out of the house so there is no reason you can't take time to get a few outfits for the bedroom, for when you go out to dinner and just hanging around the house. Men are very visual. They like to see pretty things. I just was a party planner at a wedding, where the bride liked the groom when they first met and she said straight out “Why don't you like me" he replied “I don't like heavy girls. I told her that is horrible, but she wanted this man. She lost about 75 pounds and won him and his heart. She looked ten years younger and I have to say way better than him. He did adore her. She looked so beautiful, that I have to say that was some ambition. You should not have to change the way you look to find love, but you should want to make you mate happy, to take care of yourself. Both woman and men should groom and dress to impress and so you are feeling confident as well. So first we have looking nice, taking care of you, now, what comes next? You want to have fun. Having fun is important. It is nice to get out if you can it changes the whole atmosphere. Taking it to a different level, you can use your imagination. I started dating a guy once, had just moved in to a place and had no furnisher, threw blankets on the floor and watched TV. It was different and fun. I live by the beach; sex on the beach is nice. When you are out, touch, fondle and hold. Make each other feel like they are going to come home to the best blow job, the best pussy licking and the best sex. Build up the anticipation, so much that by the time it happens you both are about to explode. If home alone, don't go right to the bedroom. Start in the living room, or over the kitchen table. Even the floor, well a rug might be nice. Be playful, be adventurous. The worst thing you can do is pull away, or say stop. Tell your partner where to go and for goodness sakes if it feels good moan, or say it feels good. It builds your mates self-esteem. It’s also a turn on, to be verbal. If you are shy start slow practice when you are alone or with a friend. If you want to dance for you partner, there are classes now, or practice on your favorite song. The whole point is having fun. Make it a frequent thing, I know you might not be able to go out, but make love, have sex but most important thing is, does it! Barbara Jeanne xo

What Men & Women Want (In Their Words)

When people are looking for a partner, then have so many demands they tell me. So I am here to tell you what I have heard, from both the men and the woman. First off, what men said? A lot of the women they date are crazy. That was the number one complaint. They may seem normal at first they said, but either from their first date or as time went by they wanted to get out and quick. Second, men dating and in relationships both say this one...that women are controlling, nag and they don't want to be with a person like this, not for the long haul. Don't have fun with the person. If you stayed married just for the sake of the children is not only hurting the children but yourself. Believe it or not, most of the men that said anything about a woman’s appearance were men on dating sites. After they have been on the sites for a bit, they even tend to change their tune and just want a normal woman. A woman to have fun with laugh with just be a nice girl. Have a good conversation with a woman and most of all, they do want long term, but they say woman that have been married getting alimony, don't want to give it up. Last of all men want a woman that doesn't put them down, they want a best friend. So ladies, let’s go over quickly, would you want someone that was trying to tell you what to do, when to do it. Nagging at you, do this, does that. Wouldn't you want to bail after a while? They like a woman that takes care of themselves but that was not the most important thing. The most important thing was they did not want to be bitched at. Men, your turn, woman feel that you are not who they met, in the beginning you would call them all the time and make them feel like they are a priority. As time goes by, you get lazy in almost every department, especially in the bedroom. You make excuses, like if we woman believe them, woman don't fall for all your short comings. If you were more attentive you wouldn't lose your woman to your best friend or another man that is making your woman feel alive and beautiful. Take time men, to put your arms around your woman to let her know you care. Touch her softly, kiss her passionately or gentle, but kiss! Don't take her for granted, if you do she will go away leaving you wondering what did you do. That is the bigger problem; you really don't know what you did wrong so i am telling you. Get your act together and treat your lady like a woman and she will stay by your side. Last, there are the people, both men and woman that do everything right, you just got a boo bee prize. You got someone that is selfish and really doesn't give a crap, about you or much more than them. So if this is the case, and they won't change...LET IT GO!  This does not just go for men and woman but for every relationship with two people. The bottom line you got to be fun and loving at least sometimes. Who would want to be with someone that is miserable all the time? That might be your own issue. Either way if you are in a relationship and this is the cases get help and tell your mate. Ending with you want to keep everything in the relationship a bit spicy, fun and lots of love going on both ways. BARBARA JEANNE xo

Believe...In Love

Believe in yourself and everything else will follow. Everyone has to love something. The love of your partner. The love of your children, or both. The love of your job or maybe even the love of food. People must love something to strive in life. The sad part is the more I talk with people and continue counseling, the more i am hearing, O I LOVE THIS, more than I am hearing I LOVE YOU! Something tells me something is going terribly wrong. I seem to see more tempory love, then the always and forever love. This love seems to be becoming a thing of the past. So what might be going wrong? Maybe we are not going for the right person. I met a 59 year old man that told me he wants to find love, but he likes young woman in their thirties. He went on to tell me that he met the woman after years of raising hes chidren alone. He dated the woman for a short period of time and married her, three months later he divorced. Why, she was still in the staying up all night, having fun stage. The surprising part is the last part of the story was his children were just a few years younger then her. So what am I saying? Go for what is good for you. Don't go for now, go for the now and later. Ladies, stop going for the bad boys. That is what they are bad, and bad for a relationship. Men, stop looking for the perfect woman, look in the mirror do you truthfully see perfection. The whole point is to find someone that is compatible. That means, being on the same page and direction but more importantly fufilling your partners needs. For example, you partner may like to play golf alone and you may love to play tennis, but somewhere during the day you need to take time to fufill you mates needs. It could be having dinner together. Taking time to talk, or a simple quick hug and kiss. To let them know you want to show them attention. Remember, if you don't water your plant it dies. That goes the same for love, if you don't cherish it, the love will die. My guess, this has happened to many of us before, and if you don't want to change, it will continue. So why not give somone you wouldn't a chance, they might adore you and you may find that is exactly what you need. More so you might find that you learn to adore them for treating you so beautifully, that bings true love. Now, when you do find someone that you do love, don't find excuses not to be with the person. Either because you dont want to settle down, what to keep looking for the next better thing and most of all you are too selfish. So once again, I am hearing people telling me, how much they want to find true love. If that is what you are truly looking for then, look for someone looking for the same thing, period. Don't date someone hoping they will fall in love with you. People are who they are. Don't expect to change them. People waste precious time. Sometimes even leading into marriage and children. Children are always a blessing but if it is wrong, give it your all, then LET IT GO! If you are not married, why are you even staying, being miserable. Now if you look in the right direction you will find love. Believe in love...IT DOES EXSIST! XO BARBARA JEANNE

LOVE STINKS, BUT IT DOESN'T HAVE TO

Man sees a woman. He likes what he sees, approaches and comes in for the kill. He wins her heart and things are going great, but then the man get a little lazy, with the calling or not seeing her as much. But that doesn't mean he's not digging her. Men just get bored or have a life, which we women seem to give up when we get a man. Then the women starts to get a bit upset may start to feel unloved and then has the tendency to start to nag, rag and bitch. So the man does not like this very much and pulls away. That makes the women very angry and hurt and sooner or later comes the claws, and the man likes this even less, so further away he goes. The women does everything in her power to keep this man, even goes to the neighborhood psychic. But maybe it is as simple as to give the man space from the get go. Give him his own time and don't punish him by not giving him sex. He has a hand and a lot of porno sites these days. Men like to be independent and like women who are independent and confident. Right or wrong, that's how it is. Women will give it her all, but when women get fed up finally at some point, they dump the man and after their heartache finally goes away, they don't look back. But with the men, they are devastated over their loss, but I'm not sure if it is because they lost a good woman, or they lost at the game. Many of the men in one study seem to have said the same thing about their broken relationship; things hadn't been going good for a while. But when they get dumped, men don't like the sting and a wounded man now a day says it's easier to stay single then to go through getting hurt again. That is only when the man realizes he lost a good thing and when it's too late. So, what can fix this problem? Women if you start seeing things going wrong in your relationship and you seem to keep putting them on the back burner and the stove is all filled up, he's not a keeper. Stop giving your heart before he deserves to have it. Your heart is a precious thing, and men, if you really aren't into that woman let her go. But have the balls to tell her, just don't disappear. If you do think she's a keeper, show her you love her. Love is like a plant, if you don't water, it dies, same as love. Last but not least, when it's over and let it go. Have your cry and move on. There is nothing worse or more painful than a broken heart and that is coming from both sexes. What could be worse is not allowing your heart to heal to find the real deal. Treat people as you would like to be treated. Treat someone you love as you would like to be loved! Barbara Jeanne xo         Most of my articles are geared toward woman, so I thought I would switch it up a bit, and this one is for both guys and girls. Maybe it will help you both get back on the same page. For some reason, we women sure do need men in our lives, even though we have had our hearts broken so many times. But what makes things different now a days, women still so desperately want to be in love, and men, once they have had their hearts broken seem to be good on the whole relationship thing. This is a big problem! So what are we to do to mend this? Well let's see how the whole thing started, and no, I'm not making this up. I am professional, I went to the source both men and women, of all ages. Let's keep this one short and sweet or maybe a bit bitter but brutally honest.