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Meeting On Social Sites Still Seems Hard to Connect: Tips to be More Successful

All those men and women looking for a relationship on line have more hurdles than they might think. You ask why? First off you don’t know really know much about them except what they tell you and the picture they have up. Many times the pictures aren’t quite who they look like and that is a major problem. You could of talk for months and gotten close but if they meet you and you aren’t what they thought many times after that meeting you can say goodbye for good. Because they are a goner, so it’s better to be honest if you believe you will meet at some time. If you have gained weight, change in any way or if you are in a relationship be honest. On line can be strange in the sense that you can talk and think things are going in a positive direction with and individual. Many people feel as if they are in a relationship and feel a closeness but they can be saying the same to another or many so be aware. They can hook you and people fall in love without meeting and this is a mighty big risk to take to begin with. Next you have the fact that many are married, in a relationship or in no way interested in being in a meaningful relationship. Yet this is what comes out of their mouths when they are in pursuit of a person they want. But what I see and hear many times are these people that do meet and become intimate ends as quickly as they met. Many times after the challenge of conquering this person they are back on line surfing the net. Instead of heading into a relationship many times it turns into a casual encounter. So many times what some or one thought was going to be a happy ending and no not sexual but with being a couple actually takes a turn for the worse. It stings when you see the person that you have been talking to, or intimate on line checking out others. The best way to have a chance of being successful at on line dating of any type of site that you can mingle is first off be single. Next off be honest and if you lose interest or move on have the decency to let them know, just don’t disappear. To disappear without an explanation or just a simple goodbye is rude and if you were digging a person you would be hurt. So realize there is etiquette of on line dating but I don’t think that many people follow any guidelines. This causes many people to get hurt and many meetings not to come to be and those that do don’t work. Keep an open mind when meeting people. Remember a kind heart goes a long way. Great conversation takes it further. Looks is a major plus but an open mind gives you a wider range to search for your soul mate. Lastly remember if you are looking for a certain status, tall dark and handsome or a knockout bombshell make sure you are the same. Good luck and happy searching. Barbara Jeanne xo


Today's Society Makes It Hard to Know How to Love

                         Everyone wants to be in love but I’m not sure if everyone knows how to love. A combination of being selfish and so out of practice, we’re not doing such a great job. Our population of people seems to not have too many great love examples to go by. We have our famous love scenes that we see on TV or the big screen but then we are told we can’t go by them because that is just a movie. So how are we supposed to know what a great romance is if we don’t see it at home and we don’t have any good role models to go by? That is a good question. We may be lucky if our parents or grandparents are still married. This will help us to see the closeness and what they did right to make it this far. If this is not the case we aren’t finding the morals of making a healthy good relationship. Especially if we had parents fighting, being unfaithful, or to see little care for a person you said I do to. We need to learn to love, to give to another and to be unselfish enough to achieve this. To be loved and to love completes you as a person. So many people go through life feeling incomplete but not knowing why and I tell them you will find peace when you allow yourself to love and be loved. If you are having a problem achieving a relationship, or finding love then take the time to see why you can’t commit or give yourself to another. You are either not opening you heart, don’t want to open your heart or are reaching way out of your league. This may mean you are looking for the wrong person and this could be why you can’t achieve a relationship, but that is the next article. Barbara Jeanne xo


When Your Crush Has Changed & You Don't Know What's Going On (Here's help)

     So you meet someone on line or in person and you feel as if your world is so much brighter, a whole lot happier and your mornings, well it seems as the sun is shining even if it’s pouring rain. This person that you have met and have been talking to seems to be putting a smile on your face ear to ear. It is such a great feeling and delight. Especially these days it seems harder than ever to meet someone that is available and a good catch. All the good ones seem to be taken, like that old saying says. As days pass the calls are coming in, the texts are plentiful. You are on your way to having the beginning of a beautiful romance or so you think. When all of a sudden without notice something seems to change. The calls become a lot less. They hardly call and they seldom answer. It’s almost a given that you know they won’t answer. When you text it takes them awhile to get back to you and when they do, there isn’t an explanation it’s no big deal. The texts are short and a bit cold. So what may have went wrong. It can be a few different things. As the got to know you there was something about you that they didn’t like and they are pulling away to sort if they like you or not. It could also be they want to keep you around in case they don’t find anyone better. It’s not fair I agree but many people hang in there hoping you are the one they choose. You should never agree to be plan b. So you wonder why you hear from them after a week or so when there has been no contact. If you already have had sex you may be getting a call or text for a booty call, never go. You will always be a booty call. They also just might not want or be ready for a relationship. If you do really like this person and you want to know the deal, go over if invited but instead of having sex… talk. Ask what is going on and ask for honesty. You might not get it but then again you might. You can give it a few weeks but after this back up. Don’t waste your precious time on a no go. Open up your mind to those that are ready for a relationship. And that they are not going to run as you two get closer. They will simply stand still and allow you to love them and they will love you. That is what should put a big smile on your face and in your heart. When you are in a situation that you are asking everyone what everything your crush is doing means, just know something is wrong. Barbara Jeanne xo


Are You Making it Harder on Yourself to Find Love?

     People are very visual that is natural. Since we were young we tend to lean towards pretty things. For little girls we tend to always have the pretty doll with the long hair. For boys it might have been a shining new red fire truck. As we grow up liking pretty things it becomes a part of what we like, what we want, who we are. When we get a new car we beam with happiness. When we get that object that we wanted and wished for we are ecstatic. It could be an x box game, or a new fishing pole that we wanted for the guys. And for us girls that favorite piece of jewelry that we finally have wrapped around our wrist, neck or finger. So many times when it comes to who we chose to go for as a partner looks is more important than we may think, no matter what people say. I have tried to match several people and many times the response comes back that they are not their type. They respond with they are too old, too this too that. I have even gotten yuck, or a straight out no. I hear excuses, and more excuses. So although when we read post that says it’s what’s on the inside of a person that counts for many this really doesn’t ring true. We see post that goes by that people like and agree on, but do we truly agree? If so then why aren’t we going for the older man that would adore us and treat us with love and respect? Men, why don’t you go for that overweight girl that would pamper and love you like you should be loved. We are way pickier than we should be; especially when we see what’s out there. From my point of view of what I see and hearing, that there is not much out there.  People may realize this the longer they are out looking that it seems to be harder than you may think to find someone on the up and up that is really looking for a serious committed relationship. Everyone seems to come back to me with a story of a heart ache, heart break and with much unhappiness. I’m not saying you have to go for someone that you have no chemistry. But if you have an open mind you will have a broader selection which gives you a better and bigger chance of finding love. My first serious boyfriend had beautiful blues eyes but was tall and dorky. I cut his hair and fixed him up and all my friends thought he was a now a cutie. So don’t always think you can fix them up but if they have a great personality and they are everything you could want and just needs a touch up, give them a chance. If you won’t budge then you have to look at yourself. If you are looking for the hot girl with the smokin body, or the tall dark and handsome man you need to see if you are on that level. I hate to be harsh but if you are looking for a hottie then ask yourself am I a hottie. Because where you may be judging someone, someone else may be judging you. In this scenario the worst part is I find that you may get a date but many times you are in the booty call list. This list is when you are called when they can’t get a date or in they are in the mood for sex. But you will stay in this category. As for men you will hear a yes from the ladies for a nice dinner but when it comes to being boyfriend material you too will stay in the take me out list. So to make your chances better just like all these posts say, if you meet someone that lifts your spirits makes you heart warm that’s a person to give a chance. If you have good conversation with someone and you like their personality, take a peek of what they may look like but I say give them a chance. If they seem like they have their act together and don’t have much baggage give them a chance. People you aren’t finding love so you aren’t doing something right. We need to stop and listen to advice once and for all. It’s not like you can put on nice shiny red lip stick or because you drive a new Porche that you will be wanted. Last of all when you put pictures up of yourself make sure your pictures are good and appealing. Be honest so you don’t give or get unpleasant surprises. Even day to day if you are single and are looking for love dress to impress. You don’t have to be all dressed up like you are going to a party but you never know where you might meet your next mate…partner…sweetheart! Barbara Jeanne xo


How to Protect Your Heart ftom getting it Broken (why guys & girls act like they do)

When you are in a relationship many times there is always one that loves one more than then the other, but that’s okay. My mother says it works better when a man love the women more. I have to say I believe her for the most part. Although many times it is the man that comes on strong, conquers the woman’s love and then pulls away leaving the girl devastated and in shock. Crying eyes, broken heart and in the state of “I thought he really liked me”. What may have gone wrong? I believe one out of three things most likely. Either the guy really liked you but wasn’t ready for a commitment and who knows may come back. Second he went too fast and wants to slow it down and this mean he doesn’t quite know how to do so. So what does he do? He slows down on the visits, the calls and the text. Girls still feel at a lost because you get close to the guy and are used to the closeness. So this hurts as well. Lastly the guy conquered your body, it is what he wanted and now he bailed. That would mean you should have kept your legs closed ladies, at least until he offered you a commitment. But overall he still is a bit of a dick. You were wrong but if that’s wants a guy wants they should have the guts to be up front and tell the girl that is all they want from them is sex, period. This leaves the girl to have the choice to say yes or no but I’d say it better be “hell no”. So how do we know how to not get hurt and protect our hearts? We can’t always know but we can see the red flags that we might notice to say “wait a minute something doesn’t seem right. I don’t want to be bias for just women. I know men get hurt as well. Many ladies play on men to get what they want and this is a crappy thing to do to anyone. Men can be sensitive and really are looking for love. Some ladies want a man to spend mega money to wine and dine them with no intentions for more than a casual thing. As well women are actually using men for sex, I know go figure but it’s true. So when it comes to people hearts be caring and don’t do to another, what you would not want done to you. If you treat people with love and care, hopefully this is exactly what will come back to you when cupid does hit you. Barbara Jeanne xo